were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
