I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
