dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
