So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
