I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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