I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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