i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
