is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Randomize
