I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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