The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize