please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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