wrigley field is MILF paradise
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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