i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
