I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
