you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
