So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
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