He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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