omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
