Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
