so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
