the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
