No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
