i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
