I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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