Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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