do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
The ass gains better be worth it
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
