it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I got her a Nickelback box set.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
