You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
