so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
nutella sex= disaster
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
