I need help removing her.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Randomize
