if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
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