Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
