It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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