you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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