So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
