On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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