He asked me if I "almost moaned"
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Every concussion has its silver lining
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
