I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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