i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
