he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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