You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
