so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
