we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
