I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
