found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Randomize
