Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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