He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I don't deserve a penis
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
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