Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize