Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
