He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
