when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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