this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
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